What if I am autistic or have ADHD as well?

The short answer

A child's assessment often gives parents new language for lifelong experiences of attention, routines, sensory input, communication or exhaustion. Recognition is not diagnosis, and resemblance within a family does not establish the same condition. You can use accessible systems now: written information, fewer communication routes, visible task ownership, predictable handovers, lower sensory load and recovery after demanding contact. If you want assessment, record examples from childhood and adulthood across home, education, work and relationships, including what you do to compensate or mask. Speak to a GP about the impact and the current adult pathway; waiting times and routes vary. Do not make your child your evidence source, interpreter or regulator. Shared neurodivergence may create understanding and may also create collisions when both people need quiet, predictability, movement or help starting. Design for both needs and keep adult responsibility with adults. Assessment may offer explanation and access to support, but you do not have to postpone practical changes until somebody confirms a label.

• Recognition through your child is a reason to explore, not proof of diagnosis.
• Use written, sensory and executive-function supports before assessment where they help.
• Record a lifelong pattern, current impact and compensating strategies.
• Keep your child outside the role of assessor, interpreter or emotional regulator.
• Plan explicitly for parent-child needs that resemble or conflict with each other.